I exited the shower and saw myself in the mirror and I let out this huge scream. I am going on vacation soon and I noticed that I was the cellulite capital of the world. My fear now is, If I go swimming that someone from the TV show,  " Deadliest Catch", might harpoon me.

I had to make a life decision to change my eating habits and embark on a weight loss program and exercise. The rule of thumb, when dieting, is to choose a diet that fits my schedule as well as my personality. Unfortunately, there wasn’t a commercially endorsed, "drink beer, eat donuts, and slam hot dogs", fat reduction program.

These diets advocate the complete opposite of each other and none of them have any fool proof evidence or research to back up their health claims. One is low in protein, high in carbs. The other is low in carbs, high in proteins. The first category promotes eating an abundance of high grain foods. At first glance this seems like a healthy way to eat but it offers a very bland menu, and without protein it will lead to energy loss. My pounds will fall off but I won’t have the strength to hold my head up.

The other demands a high quantity of meats, butter, eggs, and sour cream. This really sounds like the way to go but somehow it gives me the idea that I’m killing myself. Think I will pass on this one.

There’s raw food diets. This one says that all foods eaten in their raw state are great to eat. If I did this one I would starve myself. Death doesn’t become me. There are herbal remedies. I see where most of these are not approved and they too have no set standards as well as people other than manufacturers who will back them up. Herbs also loosen the body’s exit ramp to the point where you have to plan your day’s activities around known locations of water closets.

I am now looking at the, very many, work out videos, and books. Everything from belly dancing, aerobics, bicycling, rowing, jump roping, facial exercises, and water workouts. One of these even guaranteed the body I always wanted. I immediately chose Julia Roberts. I rented the most popular videos. I did the karate, but I kicked out the television set. I started running, weightlifting, pushups, and situps. For about 3 days I actually followed the workout program. This won’t cut it. I was so exhausted that I decided that I would do this only 2 times a week. On those 2 days it rained and I couldn’t run. Well, if I can’t do the entire workout, I would have to pass on the rest.

I even went out and bought 3 sweatsuits, head bands, wrist bands, gloves for weightlifting, running shoes, and a pedometer. This is one time when I knew I could use this stuff just working around the yard. This stuff makes me look hip when I’m on my John Deere riding lawn mower.

I’ve decided the best way to do this is to go to a doctor and let them direct my weight loss. My appointment is after the 4th of July weekend. Why waste a good BBQ eating like a sparrow. I’ll keep you advised on my progress. I’d take a picture but you shouldn’t be subjected to the shock.

More progress notes later.

Tom    

Its a time when we need to prepare ourselves for storms. There is no certain time of year. There is no way to predict them. Tornadoes can wipe away a house, business, neighborhood or entire town. We see it in the news and we see it first hand. When the alerts come, it is our job to be ready.

Prepare your home tornado plan. Pick a place where family members could gather if a tornado is headed your way. It could be a basement or cellar, a center hallway, bathroom, or closet on the lowest floor. Keep this place identified to all and most of all uncluttered. If you live in a hi-rise building, you may not have enough time to go to the lowest floor. Pick a place in a hallway in the center of the building.

Have a go bag ready to go. Stay tuned for storm warnings. Listen to your local radio and TV stations for updated storm information. Know what a tornado WATCH and WARNING means. A tornado WATCH means a tornado is possible in your area. A tornado WARNING means a tornado has been sighted and may be headed for your area. Go to safety immediately. Tornado WATCHES and WARNINGS are issued by counties.

When you have a tornado WATCH…listen to your local radio and television. Listen for updates because it reflects on the plans you need to make. Be sure to be alert to changing weather patterns. Blowing debris or the sound of an approaching freight train would be a likely tornado.

When a tornado WARNING is issued and you are inside. You should go to that place we mentioned earlier. this will protect you from flying debris and glass. If your outside, you should select a basement of a building or lie flat in a ditch or low lying area. If you are in a car or mobile home, get out immediately and head for safety,

After the tornado passes, watch for fallen power lines. and stay out of damaged area. Inspect your home. Don’t use candles.

Print this out for future use.

Tom Madison

Beer Can Chicken sounded like a good idea…

We owned a Boston Bulldog named Frisky when I was a kid. We didn’t really own the dog because the animal did pretty much whatever it wanted. Feeding crayons to Frisky ensured our yard had the most colorful yard in the neighborhood. Encouraging my younger brother to swallow rubber bands did not yield the same results. My father told everybody that something was wrong with me. Did you know if you squeeze Orajel on an ant trail the insects can’t feel their legs. Maybe my father was right.

Today at Wal-Mart I bought this contraption called the Beer Can Chicken Roaster. A co-worker suggested I should try it, and claimed it made the juiciest chicken in the world. After driving home, I wasted no time getting the instrument out of the box. There was a wire cone about five inches tall, and a flat circular metal tray. Not much to get excited about. Opening a can of beer, I drank three swallows before placing the can inside the indentation in the center of the tray. The stainless steel wire cone snapped over the top of the beer can to hold it in place. Simple enough.
Removing a whole chicken from the fridge, I began the uncomfortable act of shoving the wire covered beer can up the birds rear end. The chicken seems to be handling the abuse rather well. I patted the bird on the back, and complimented it on accomplishing the incommodious feat.

Next I pushed a small potato into the chickens neck. The raw chicken is standing at attention before me causing a wave of patriotism to flow through my body. I’m not the only one with goose bumps. I saluted the bird before placing it inside the oven at 375 degrees.

 
The theory behind this vertical style of cooking is the fat drips off the roasting bird onto the tray, and the steam from the beer deposits moisture back inside the chicken.

The process seemed to be going fairly well until I checked to see how the chicken was cooking. Opening the oven door revealed the bird pointing one of its golden brown wings directly at me in an accusatory fashion. After breaking the wing and pressing it gently against the birds side, I informed the chicken that George Bush would not consider my actions torture.  

The chicken appeared to have swollen a bit while cooking. Standing erect inside my oven, the bird looked like Aunt Lilly after she started taking the depakote. Listening to a few extra voices is better than a massive weight gain. I mentioned to Aunt Lilly that I still had the afghan she made me for Christmas.
My wife wandered into the kitchen during my conversation with the chicken. If she considered my actions unusual, she didn’t mention it. Mary has commented on other occasions about me being strange, and she does roll her eyes a lot. She once told her parents that I was visiting from one of the group homes.

The final straw came when I removed the chicken from the oven. The eye in the potato winked at me. I’m susceptible to the temptation of seduction just like anybody else, but the wink made me feel uncomfortable.
I never found out if the chicken was juicy or not. Instead of eating the bird, I positioned it outside on the patio railing. The crows had Aunt Lilly looking anorexic by the end of the day.

In a couple weeks we will be celebrating our independence. A lot has changed since way back then. Now its all about picnics, potato salad, baked beans and hot dogs. Well, why shouldn’t it be. The other day by the beach at Pickwick, I was sitting and writing and a little young man walked up and asked me what I was doing. He was a polite little fella so I told him that I wrote for a local online magazine. he told me that he was from Arkansas, I believe he said , Pine Bluff. That his family was vacationing for 5 days here at Pickwick.

We sat there and talked about fishing and camping and then he said that his mom was going to be angry for not telling her where he was. I told him that it would be a good idea to go do that because I didn’t want to see him in trouble. He was gone about 20 minutes and he came back to talk some more. We sat there for a couple hours and talked baseball, hunting, his school, and helping his mom with chores. I was really impressed about the thoughtfulness of this young boy. His mom came by and introduced herself. She said that her son’s name was Doug and he was named after his father. She also said that his father was killed in Iraq. I gave her my apologies and she said that it’s been 3 years now since his passing. That they all took it hard but it was little Doug that took it the worse.

She said that it was nice for him to have a man to talk to for a change. I told her that he was a very nice boy and that in a short while that he would have a new father in their life and that she surely would remarry. Might not be right away but most likely it would happen again. She said goodbye as well as Doug and they went back to the campground.

It was then that I realized that there was a lot of men and women that were missing from families. That there are a lot of kids like Doug that have a parent missing due to the wars overseas. I sat there and realized fully that this is the price we pay for freedom. This is what we call independence. God bless America!

Tom Madison 

We have made our decision and will be moving in to 439 East Main Street in Adamsville, Tennessee. We are so excited about putting our new business in Adamsville. Our location is next to the Quik Mart there. I n fact we are adjoined to the Quik Mart Building. The location and small size of the building is perfect for our office. I want to say thank you to Doug Holden for his help getting us settled. We will be taking the space over in July. Right now they are fixing the office to accomodate us.

We did look at a different office area in the downtown area but the owner said he already had a person interested in it. He thought that the area was bigger than what we needed and without us even looking at it, he decided that we wouldn’t like it. I guess it was meant to be because we are so delighted to have a location where we will be able to have so many of our neighbors see us. Besides, the location downtown is being rented by a service oriented business which hopefully will be a good customer for us.

We are also going to print a magazine monthly called Pickwick Express. It will feature the same things covered in our website. We will be able to cross-promote our business as well as the businesses that will advertise with us. One thing for sure is that we will be very affordable compared to other advertisers in the area. At first, the magazine will be delivered only in the Adamsville area but will grow until it is covering the same 3 county area as the web site.

Again, thank you to everyone who helped us with our business home selection. The kindness that the area shows us is heart warming.

Tom Madison

I am happy to say that we will put our business in the heart of the tri-county area. We will be in Adamsville, TN. I have to say that while we were driving the other day, I noticed from a car seat the warmth of this town. You can feel the sense of belonging. I get that in every town I visit. Savannah, Crump, Selmer, Corinth, Pickwick, Michie, Counce, Shiloh, Stantonville, Eastview, Guys, Morris Chapel and all the rest, are wonderful places to live.

I am so proud to have this new web site, this new online magazine and community directory in an area that is so friendly and welcoming. We have not decided as of yet our new address but we will very soon. Thank you to all who have already said welcome. We will do our best as a media source to show everyone how much we will give to McNairy County, Hardin County in Tennessee and Alcorn County in Mississippi.

All of us at Pickwickexpress.com urge all of you to log on to the internet and to our web site. Register yourself and become a part of our family. You can then list as many free classifieds as you desire. You can use our employment section. This is your magazine, so read the stories and comment as you wish. You can read the news, sports, entertainment news, local weather, get fishing reports, church listings, local events, a complete business directory, recipes, local authors, and so much more.

Thank You again and we will do our very best to give you a top notch online magazine for our beautiful area.

Tom Madison 

Louisiana, was the only U.S. state that still had legal cockfighting. The National Geographic’s web site says that it would change. Cockfighting is very bad for a state’s image and besides it’s definitely cruel.

This past week a burglary in Savannah led to a cockfighting operation in Morris Chapel. The man charged was having this event in a nice air conditioned building that had bleachers built. In case some of you are unaware of this cruel blood sport, it pits two roosters against each other. Spectators place bets, and the fight ends after one or both roosters die.

Cockfighting is illegal in all states, and is a felony in 35. besides being cruel, it is connected to other crimes like gambling, drugs, illegal firearms and homicide. These birds fight to the death and then their tossed away like trash.

So I say to all of you that congratulations are in order for Law Enforcement in Savannah and Hardin County. They put good investigating to use by uncovering this cruel cockfighting from a burglary. This is the lowest form of entertainment that’s out there in this day-to-day world. When we get a chance to remove this cruelty from our society, all will benefit.      

Tom Madison

Pickwick Livin"

One day back in 1965, I was a junior in high school and definitely a new rock and roll boy. Then one day I was riding with my dad to the store and a song came on the radio called, ” Make The World Go Away”. I was astonished at that pure voice and the easiness of the song. I was an Eddy Arnold fan for life. I never gave up on rock and roll until the 80’s when it turned trashy with all the lyrics. I was a country music fan that loved the old standards.

When rock and roll was hot, Eddy’s music took a slide. Just like all country music. Isn’t it something, when rock and roll turned hard, when it turned to rap, when it was trash, the old rock and roll artists turned to country. Amazing that I was allowed to see that.

Today, Eddy Arnold would have been 90 years old. Last week, on May 8th, he passed away. His wife of 64 years, Sally Gayhart Arnold passed away last March after having hip replacement surgery.

There are too many awards to talk about and too many accomplishments by Eddy Arnold to put in this blog. I just wanted to say that he was important to some of us from a time gone by. He gave us music that could never ever be duplicated by another. Last month I was sitting at the computer and I played several of his songs and thought about his career and the impact that his music had with me.

When I was a DJ and worked many years at a country music radio station, I attended a seminar in Nashville where Mr. Arnold was on the panel . I had a chance to sit with him, shake his hand and talk. He was a real human being, not a person who put himself above all the rest. I felt I was sitting and talking with a friend that I had known for years. He made everyone feel like that when he came in contact with them. Eddy Arnold was, and always will be, an AMERICAN ICON.

We will all miss you Eddy….

Tom Madison

I was reading a blog from Valery the other day about Accessibility. She happens to own www.canesgalore.com and I ask all of you to check out her Blog at www.Vallytle.com…. The disabled of this world are no longer a small number of people. I have real bad knees and will have knee replacement surgery at some time soon. Soon, being, in a few years. My cane means the world to me.

As Valery says in her blog, “Sometimes the world has to adapt to them.” Instead of the reverse. Everyone at some point has a disability happen to them. Then they seem to understand how important, accessibility is. I know that at some point in the last 3 years I had enough pain to limit walking all together. I had to learn how to walk all over again. If it wasn’t for mobility aids, I wouldn’t have made it.

Walking again with the help of a cane is like me being a new man. I can get around and enjoy life. Now that I have said this, why can’t we as a society have better ways for our disabled to navigate. Streets, Elevators, Buildings, Restrooms, Hotel Rooms, Stores, all of these and many more are in need of consideration for improvement to help our disabled.

If you own a business or design houses or businesses, please take the disabled into consideration. All of us deserve it and lives will be easier.

Thank You

Tom Madison

We have such a beautiful lake at our fingertips. I was on Pickwick lake last weekend with my friend Walt and as we stopped in some shallow water to fish, I noticed beer cans on the bottom of the lake. What kind of inconsiderate person would do this. Hardin County and McNairy County are beautiful counties to live in. Why do we trash them? There are waste barrels at all boat ramps! Whether or not your a tourist or a local, it’s obvious that we have a small concern about the litter that we toss into our waterways. God made this beautiful lake and shoreline for us to recreate and release some stress from our daily routine. To make our home beautiful, it takes everyone to help. Please don’t toss your cans and bottles into the lake. Please don’t toss wrappers into the water as you cruise the waterways. Yes, we do have signs that say you will be fined if you litter and we even post the amount you will be fined if your caught. There isn’t enough police, sheriffs, park rangers or anyone of authority to catch all you litterbugs. Its going to take law abiding citizens to turn these people in. Get a license plate number if you can or a boat registration. Turn your information into a law enforcement officer. They may not be able to fine the guilty parties but they can give them a stern warning. At least they will know that we won’t put up with that stuff in our Pickwick Dam area. Sure we want this tourist income but if this precious lake becomes a garbage dump, those tourists will go elsewhere. It will cause a strain to everyone that depends on the tourism to boost our economy. To all of you ….please have fun in God’s playground…and keep the playground clean.